My life In the meantime

Lately I've been thinking a lot about my life, who I am, who I want to be and it's led me to make a few big changes.  I think that leaving my longterm relationship was the best thing I could have done for myself, even it that was hard to see at the time. It's like a huge weight has been lifted and I feel better than I have ever felt in my life. It even seems to have affected me physically as I have been told a lot lately by people of both genders that I look really good.  It seems like many of my conversations have been going something like the one I had with an old girl friend I ran into the other night "you look really good! Not that you didn't look good before, but now you look, like,  REALLY good."  I never really understood how much how you feel on the inside can affect how you look on the outside until now.  It's like happiness is oozing out of my orifices. And yes, I did just use the word orifice; I couldn't help myself.

It also brought me the opportunity to leave for China guilt and (somewhat) attachment free.  I say somewhat attachment free because not so long ago I realized that I am completely smitten with on an old friend, and as luck would have it he seems to be equally interested.  Normally I wouldn't be brave enough to admit my feelings for someone, but since I am leaving for China and I didn't want to go without expressing myself, I told him.  I will reluctantly admit that a little bit of liquid courage and instant messaging may have played a part in my gutsy move.  To my utter disbelief, (because really, how much better can things get??) he reciprocated by telling me that I'm the most beautiful girl he ever met and he can't live without me.  Okay, maybe I'm stretching the truth the tiniest bit, but he did say that he likes me too <3.